Restroom conversation

"Nice sideburns, brah".

I walked over to Coworkers desk today to tell him that I purchased the Interstellar DVD+Blue Ray+Digital Release Combo pack with included IMAX Film Cell! But Coworker was not in his office. Saddened, I headed back to my office, but not before stopping into the restroom to offload about 3 gallons of coffee.

As I stood at the urinal I heard someone rustling around in the stall. Yes! I thought, that's probably Coworker, this will be funny!

Me: Hello, Coworker!

 No response.

Me: That's not Coworker in the stall is it?  

Contractor: Nope, it's Contractor.

Oh, it's contractor. Contractor is new and doesn't know anyone. This is awesome!

Me: Oh, hi Contractor. Sorry about that. How are you doing?  

Contractor: I'm doing well, lots of work to catch up on this week since I was out a couple of days last week. 

Me: Yeah? Well, I hope it all goes smoothly. I just walked by Coworker's office and he wasn't in there, so when I walked in here and heard someone in the stall I got hopeful that it would be Coworker and that I could freak him out a little bit by knowing he was in the stall. It would have been funny, but instead it was just... Awkward. Sorry about that. 

Contractor: But that made it funny! Thanks for the laugh! 

Me: No problem.

I zipped up and made my way to the sink to wash my hands.

Me: Say, you know what's really funny? 

He hesitated.

Contractor: No, what? 

Me: This!

I finished drying my hands, threw away the paper towel, opened the door, and left.

I headed back to my office, congratulating myself on confusing the new guy, and typed this. Life's not fair sometimes, and now Contractor is sitting at his desk wondering who he had a chat in the restroom with, and trying to figure out if he missed the punchline or if he is the punchline.

Interstellar is a good movie. You should buy it.

-Austin